When you get fired from a job it can literally feel like a punch in the gut. Trust me I know firsthand… I got fired twice in a row in under a month… oops! So this week, I'm sharing 6 things to do when you get fired from a job.

Swallow your pride

Resist the urge to tell everyone off. If you're in a situation like I was, chances are you may have a rude boss to begin with, who is guaranteed to say some offensive things, like “it's a maturity issue”… *Uhm, I'm not the one that cried in your arms the other week ?*

Remember, this is not a tit-for-tat situation. Let them say whatever and swallow your pride. Listen to their feedback, there will probably be some truth to it. Resist the urge to emotionally respond to their points and save yourself from future regrets in doing so.

Plus, in most cases, the decision is final, so there is no reason to share your side of the story. You'll likely dig yourself a deeper grave if you do.

Be humble

While you don't have to respond to their questions or points, don't be a petty with your silence either. Be diplomatic and stay humble. When in doubt, respond with an attitude of gratitude.

If whoever is firing you asks to co-sign their reasoning, example, “You seemed really unhappy here, don't you agree?” Deflect!

Too often, especially for women, we over-apologize for our behavior. You do not need to say, “yes you're right I'm so sorry!”

Instead, “I can see how it may have appeared that way, I wish we would've had the opportunity to discuss this earlier, either way I am so grateful to have been a part of this team.” When in doubt, always come back to gratitude.

And guess what? You should be grateful! Getting fired is an opportunity to learn and grow.

Advocate for your needs

In the first job I was fired from, the only reason I stuck around was for my clients. My clients were gone for the day when I got fired. At the time, I was a mental health and substance abuse counselor and several people on my caseload struggled with abandonment issues. There was no way I could in good conscious leave without properly saying goodbye. So I advocated for what I and my clients needed, which was to have a proper goodbye with them.

Initially when I asked to go back in the morning and see them, when my boss hesitated. I made it clear that this was for the well being of the clients and if I didn't see them in the morning then I would head to the residences and see them before I left for the day since its against our ethical code as counselors to cause undue harm. She agreed I could come back in the morning. Saying goodbye to my clients the next morning is a moment that still brings tears to my eyes. I spent five to six days a week deep in these people's lives and histories, and it was important to show them how to have closure in a healthy manner.

The second job tried to not pay me unemployment since you can fire without cause in FL, but I dragged out the appeals process since I knew I deserved it and ultimately won! Don't let them keep knocking you down when you know you have a right to something!

Just because the job is over, doesn't mean you won't have unfinished business, make sure you can leave yourself in as good of standing with your clients or financial needs as possible, since that's part of a foundation for your future and part of your personal brand.

“Your brand is what other people say about you when you’re not in the room.” – Jeff Bezos, AmazonClick To Tweet

Trust your gut on the exit interview

Before getting fired, I never knew an exit interview was a thing. Turns out, its a normal thing for both fired and quitting employees.

When asked if I would do it by HR, I declined. Our HR person knew the issues in the organization, hated my boss as well, and nothing had changed in the 10 months I was there with the 10+ other employees from my department who had quit or been fired. Why was I going to go on record and seem like a petty, salty, scorned employee? The company knew what was up and wasn't doing anything to change it.

On the other hand…

If you've read the story of how I got fired from my dream job, you might recall I had a friend who also thought she was going to get fired. Well a week after I left, she took another job knowing she'd be next. She put in her two weeks and during those, the boss began mimicking and trash talking my friends new employer in front of her – Let's just say, my friend was done.

She went straight to HR, said she couldn't do the two weeks because the boss was too toxic and put everything, I mean everything, in writing for her exit interview. Honestly, I think her exit interview was what pushed the company to do the internal investigation and get rid of the boss. 

Think about your situation…

You see there are two sides to the coin. If you're getting fired, chances are your exit interview will hold less weight, since you're a scorned employee and people in leadership roles often aren't fans of negative feedback. However, if you're in a position to truly make a difference maybe put it all out there like my friend did. If you can, document everything in advance so when you do speak with HR, it's not a “he-said-she-said” game, it's actual documented facts.

Only take what's yours!

Seriously, don't take stuff that's not yours! Sounds obvious, but resist the urge to spitte steal that stapler (I dk if people actually do this, but I saw it in one too many movies so I thought it deserved a mention).

Ask questions to understand short term and long term effects

Resist the urge to run for the door and instead ask questions. Make sure you have a full understanding of where you stand.

Consider asking these questions when you get fired:

– What's the status of severance and benefits?

Will your employer compensate you for unused vacation and sick days? How long and what does continuing healthcare coverage look like? Will you receive severance pay? What happens to your 401k? Will they pay for unemployment? Cross check all the responses with your employee handbook!

Unemployment is tricky and on a state to state basis. Sometimes if you're fired without cause or certain scenarios where you're fired with cause can result in no unemployment coverage.

I my state, it's a lengthy process to receive unemployment and an even more involved/irritating process to keep it. So figure out how valuable this is for you.

– What will be said about you to future references?

This goes hand in hand with who you should put as a reference. As I packed my office, HR said I could put her name for a reference. Which I was super grateful for. It got me thinking, if I didn't have a new job already lined up, who would I have put? So often we only think about our boss when we think about references. A few months later, when my boss was no longer there, I realized it's okay to put general HR contact information since there is no guarantee your boss is still with the company either.

– Can I resign instead of getting fired?

If you're nervous about the stigma of getting fired, see if they will let you resign instead. However, make sure you fully understand the effects of this!

If you were counting on benefits or unemployment being paid out to you, the moment you go from “fired” to “resigned” you'll likely lose those! However, if your employer isn't paying out anything, then what do you really have to lose in most cases?

[RELATED] I got fired. Twice – in under a month. Here's what happened.

Random Tip For Before You Get Fired:

As a general rule of thumb – always backup your files! Since I knew I was getting fired, I made copies of clinical resources, like worksheets and handouts, I wanted for the future. I also saved emails via screenshots on my phone to my personal records that showcased the toxicity. I never did anything with the emails. However, if you might want to take legal action in the future, it's good to have them.

[RELATED] 8 Things I Wish I Knew Before Entering The Workforce

I know maintaining your composure while getting fired can feel challenging, but it's important. A year later, after my boss was long gone, the first company actually hired me back! These tips really do work to keep your professional reputation in tact and ensure you aren't burning any bridges.

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6 Things To Do When Fired From A Job

1. Swallow your pride

2. Be humble

3. Advocate for your needs

4. Trust your gut on the exit interview

5. Only take what's yours!

6. Ask questions to understand short term and long term effects