5 Signs It’s Time To Take A Step Back

take a step back perspective, take a step back quotes, quarter life crisis, moving forward

(Archive Post) Flash Back Friday!

If you’re new around here, every Friday I revive an archive post or share a guest post! This one is from August 22, 2016! So some of the information was a little time sensitive. So, while I am feeling a little burnt out, my past isn’t the cause! I am also not hosting a summit this year. Buttt I will be a part of one in the Fall ’17, so stay tuned for those details! Either way, I still think these 5 signs are a great way to tell if you need to take a step back from something!


 

Today’s post is going to get real, raw, and possibly pretty cryptic…

If you’re on my mailing list, you probably saw the update last week about all the changes coming to the blog… and were expecting a new episode of the Inspiring Millennials series today… but alas there’s no episode.

Many of you know from my Instagram, that I’ve been working my tail off on co-hosting my first summit! I am beyond excited for you guys to learn and grow from it when it’s finally live! We have some fantastic speakers including past vlog guests: Erica Ligenza, Kayla Hollatz, Kayla Buell (Cruez), Tayo Rockson, Scott Barlow, Angela Ford, just to name a few.

And many of you might know from my Instagram, how stressed out I’ve been lately. Over these last couple of weeks some personal issues from my past have taken a massive toll on my energy and mood.

I 150,000,000% love being an entrepreneur and a blogger. I love the excitement of the day-to-day the new projects, the new people… but when sh*t hits the fan, there is no PTO, no sick days, no bereavement days… it’s just you. Which means you have to face your shortcomings head on. 

As some of you know, I have struggled with anxiety and depression since I was a little girl. It went undiagnosed for years. I remember being in elementary school having a panic attack, and the adults teasing me telling me to “stop with the alligator tears”.

[RELATED] How To Cope With Anxiety In Real Life

I was always so confused by this response. If I could catch my breath, don’t you think I would? Do you really think I enjoy the feeling of the walls closing in, my heart palpitating, and feeling like I can’t breathe? Hell No. 

It wasn’t until a series of tragic events occurred during high school that I finally started to get the help that I needed for my anxiety and depression. Since the age of 17, I’ve accrued a few diagnoses: generalized anxiety disorder (GAD), post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD),  and dysthymic disorder, which in simplest of terms means I struggle with mild, long term episodes of depression that have been more on than off since I was about 4 years old.

Over the last ten years, I’ve done a really good job of getting the proper treatment and education I needed to live a happy, balanced, and fulfilling life. I’ve been fortunate to learn how to develop friendships again, meet the love of my life, and find a way into a profitable career that supports my lifestyle I need and want to maintain.

[RELATED] 5 Ways My Wedding Was Different Than I Imagined It’d Be

But these last couple of weeks have been tough. I mean really tough. So much from my past has been kicked up that I can’t even begin to grasp and comprehend it all. Someday I will probably share it in a book or blog, but not today. Today I need to take a step back and shift some things.

So how do I know it’s time to take a step back and re-prioritize my life?

1. Off Balance

While my productivity has been through the roof lately, my relationships have been totally off kilter. I’ve been working 16 hour days, not spending time with my fiance or friends the way I should. I feel empty and burnt out as a result. I’ve been letting the things I love (the blog and Instagram) fall to the wayside as I hurriedly put up a half assed post.

2. Stuffing feelings

I find myself fighting back tears on and off throughout the day. It’s as if the emotion is sitting just below my eyes, waiting for something to open the flood gate of tears at any moment.

3. Body hurts

I have a constant knot in my stomach and pressure in my chest. My body just feels heavy and dull even with attempting extra workouts and massages to wake it and loosen it up.

4. Rudeness

I have been unbelievably short and rude with people lately. I hear the things coming out of my mouth and am literally embarrassed by the condescension and tone in my voice… this is not a reflection of who I am, but where I am at.

5. Not Present

I am not really present in anything that I am doing. In barre class I’m off balance, I am burning dinner, I am checked out of movies or shows that I love. I am literally ghosting my life.

Right now the only priority I can have is to take care of myself. Focusing on meditation each morning, getting organized and productive in the tasks the fuel me, and revisiting my life’s mission statement to help me regain focus and clarity.

With all of that said, the summit has been postponed as I get a handle on things again, and the regularly scheduled Monday vlogs are going on a hiatus for now. Eventually I do plan on bringing back the Inspiring Millennials series, most likely near the end of the year, but my efforts should be focused elsewhere at this time.

For now, I am not totally sure if I will post on Mondays. I am going to hold off the next two weeks and finally get a grasp on my content calendar again and we will see.

With all of that said, what would you like to see more of on the blog? I feel like I am starting back at ground zero in some ways with how much is unscheduled and planned so if I can tailor things to serve you best, let me know in the comments! Some ideas: mental health awareness, relationships, travel, product reviews, entertainment based life lessons (read: life lessons from Bachelor in Paradise, anyone?)

[RELATED] 12 Things To Do When You Don’t Want To Do Anything At All

Thank you so much for being a part of this journey with me,

xoxo

Rachel


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  • Ivanna
    August 18, 2017 at 9:17 am

    Great post. I think being present is a big one for me when it’s time to step back. When I can’t focus or remember what someone said to me, I know I am too distracted and need to take a step back as well.

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 19, 2017 at 11:05 am

      Yes! that’s such great insight Ivanna! If we can’t be present than we really can’t be effective. By taking the time to step back we can recover and become more productive and present and engaged in our lives more quickly than when we try to force it!

  • Mara Zota
    August 18, 2017 at 10:10 am

    This happens to me too. I am a perfectionist and I don’t have any patience. So I want everything to happen now. It’s stressful and I can’t sleep at night. I am working my ass out, and I have so many ideas… I should take a break but I just can’t..

  • Kristen Jones
    August 18, 2017 at 10:24 am

    Love this post girly. There are so many times I feel this way as well and I have to force myself to practice a little self-care in order to get myself back on track.

  • Katherine @ Slightly Savvy
    August 18, 2017 at 10:29 am

    Lol I literally relate to this so much. Everything can be really overwhelming especially when you’re ambitious and a perfectionist combined. I totally feel the feeling of there’s literally not enough hours in the day to accomplish everything. About 2 weeks ago, I was incredibly burnt out too and legit almost started crying one day when I was so stressed. All that helped really was giving away some projects – letting others design something for me, etc. Delegating and getting helped really helped me.

    xoxo girl

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 19, 2017 at 11:03 am

      Haha yes girl! There are neverrr enough hours! And I had a feeling you would be reaching burnout levels soon with the vacation then course launch and then all your normal responsibilities haha! Let me know if you want to have a coffee date in the next week or two!

  • Summer @ Coffee With Summer
    August 18, 2017 at 11:59 am

    Ugh this is so me lately, but I can’t step back. I’ve been feeling all of this because I was away from blogging due to other full-time work I had temporarily. I am tending to self-care, so I’m hoping these feelings will pass so I can kick ass with my blog again.

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 19, 2017 at 11:02 am

      Why can’t you step back? We always have a choice! And how you choose to do it may look differently than the next person.

      • Summer @ Coffee With Summer
        August 21, 2017 at 12:31 pm

        Because I’ve been away for over a month from my blog. I thought I’d be at a way different place than I am now – I am way behind from where I had envisioned myself. So, I can’t break now. Eventually!

  • Sabrina
    August 18, 2017 at 12:48 pm

    It’s so important to know our limits and when to take a step back. Thanks for sharing your story!

  • Super Millennial
    August 18, 2017 at 1:45 pm

    Not easy being your own boss I agree 100%, but its worth it!

  • She's Not So Basic
    August 18, 2017 at 2:31 pm

    ahhh I love this post. I’ve referred to it quite a few times in the past almost year that I’ve known you! esp when I was deciding to step back from running my emailing business in the beginning of summer. While temporarily passing up my income was a hard pill to swallow, I now see how important it has been for me mentally

  • Tilley
    August 18, 2017 at 3:16 pm

    I have def been guilty of these five things over time…even last night my right hand started to shake profusely! I took that as an immediate red flag to take a step back!

  • Kait | Life as Kait
    August 18, 2017 at 3:43 pm

    The stuffing feelings part you mentioned is something I struggle a lot with. I grew up being taught that crying isn’t acceptable (or, at least.. that’s what I interpreted as a child). So, alas… I have a VERY hard time crying. Honestly, that is something all I need to do to feel all the feels. I watch really sad movies and shows to make myself cry & it actually helps!! lol

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 19, 2017 at 11:01 am

      Yes!!! I do that exact same thing! Only I cry very easily, but i just need to get it out somehow and if I don’t cry it out, I’ll mask it with anger. IT feels SO good to cry it all out though!

  • Amanda | The Light Owl
    August 18, 2017 at 3:47 pm

    “this is not a reflection of who I am, but where I am at.” you NAILED it. That is exactly what I needed to hear today. These last two weeks have been really rough for me. Thankfully, my husband and I are in the process of planning a mini vacation, and we have a few fun plans this weekend to get my mind out of this deep dark hole.

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 19, 2017 at 11:00 am

      Ahh happy I chose this flash back post then!! I just felt like after so many people said they were in a rut on Wednesdays post, that we all needed a little time for reflection and permission to have some fun and take care of ourselves <3 <3 Hope you can take a mental break!!

      • Amanda | The Light Owl
        August 19, 2017 at 2:16 pm

        Thank you! Definitely making time for a much needed break (or 3) this weekend!

  • Jenny
    August 18, 2017 at 4:59 pm

    Totally needed this today! It’s been a busy season and I’m trying not to burn out so I need to follow some of these.

  • Kiaya Park
    August 18, 2017 at 5:17 pm

    I just started college like literally this is my second day of school and I feel like I have absolutely no time and I’m just rude and bitter and normally I’m not like this! Thank you for the post so I know I’m not the only one I will deff take a step back and look at the better things in life! Thank you for this post!

  • Valerie Hansen
    August 18, 2017 at 7:09 pm

    Good reminders here and I have some of these signs…I def need to take a step back..on overload from blogging etc… Your summit soudns amazing..wish I was going to one! Have fun

    VAlerie

  • jillconyers
    August 19, 2017 at 6:48 am

    Great read Rachel. It hasn’t always been the case, but I’m very good at recognizing when I need to take a step back. Even better, is when I know I need to I do. That’s progress!

  • Alix Maza
    August 19, 2017 at 3:36 pm

    YES GIRL! My body always acts up when I’m stressed or anxious. It’s the first sign I get really.

  • Elizabeth Johnson
    August 19, 2017 at 3:55 pm

    Love this! You are so right. When I am not present during family time or especially being rude to them I need to take a step back. The job I had before I started blogging, I was letting it consume me. I wasn’t passionate about the job/company and even though my boss was the best boss I ever had it just wasn’t the place for me. I became mean and spoke poorly to my husband, I had to leave. Taking care of my mental state is so key!

  • Anna Hubbard
    August 19, 2017 at 9:38 pm

    I often find that I get a bit crabby and rude when I get overstressed. That’s why I made the decision to finally quit my part time job and just focus on my last semester of school!

  • Kristin Cook
    August 20, 2017 at 10:30 am

    Yes! I feel ya on this! It can be so easy to get off-kilter and sometimes it takes a loved one pointing it out for us to notice. Other times, though, we know it. We just have to make the effort to fix it. When I have days and days of being super grumpy, it’s a sign of needing to find some balance.

  • Cameron
    August 20, 2017 at 4:56 pm

    Love this so much! I definitely get where you are coming from with this – I definitely needed a break myself lately and it honestly helped so much to just take a step back from everything for a few days and work on m

  • Kallie
    August 21, 2017 at 6:36 am

    Such a helpful post. I think even people who don’t suffer from anxiety can understand when it’s time to take a step back, recharge, meditate, or whatever.

  • Autumn @ Stay gold Autumn
    August 21, 2017 at 9:41 am

    I have been reading through all of your posts a lot here lately as I just quit my first job ever (my job situations always ended because of contract timing etc). For me, I have autoimmune issues and when I feel stressed I feel it ALL OVER. Stress causes me massive flareups now and this was a huge reason why I knew I needed to quit my job. Love this post!

  • Taylor Smith
    August 21, 2017 at 10:36 am

    I think it’s super important to make sure you are putting your mental and emotional health FIRST on top of everything else. You cannot let your work get in the way of taking care of YOU.

  • Gina Alyse
    August 22, 2017 at 6:46 pm

    I love how you are able to identify your needs and your self-awareness about where you are right now. I think one of our most important qualities is self awareness and being able to adjust when we need to and not take something on just because. I am inspired by your choices and I wish you all the luck and support to find a better sense of balance and health moving forward!

  • Alex Carreno
    August 23, 2017 at 9:46 am

    It’s definitely something for me to work on as well. I was diagnosed with anxiety a few years ago, and have worked really hard to cope with it. It’s a struggle, and for me too, a series of unfortunate passings of close family members and life changes have made it hard. But I finally feel like I’m in a good place!

    • [email protected] Confused Millennial
      August 23, 2017 at 10:19 am

      I’m so sorry to hear about your losses <3 I always look at it all (Anxiety, loss, etc.) as a pendulum, there are good times and then times you just get blind sighted by it. Sending you lots of positive vibes and happy to hear you're in a good place!

  • Silvia Marquez
    August 23, 2017 at 11:07 am

    I agree with all of these signs. I also get short and rude with people and it’s not till someone calls me out that I take a step back and see that I need a break.

  • Elly
    August 25, 2017 at 7:43 pm

    identifying with an alarmingly large amount of these lol I feel like I’ve been such a bitch lately to people because I’m so stressed! def in need of some PTO

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