Carrying my red suitcase, I changed places, countries, continents, and couches over the last several years. Whenever a friend called me, the first question was never, “how are you?” but “where are you?” I avoided any kind of shopping – not only because of my limited money – but out of fear that my suitcase would no longer close. While I still posted pictures of each new exciting destinations, I felt alone and lost between the different places. Slowly, I began to lose the feeling of belonging and connection and counted more the ‘goodbyes’ than ‘hellos’ within a month.
When I finally returned to my so called home, I realized that friends had left. When I finally found a job in my country of origin, I realized that it's even more difficult to make friends there compared to many international communities.
I describe myself as a citizen of the world and somebody with an open mind and broad perspectives – but if I am being honest, most of my international friends share the same social background and I cannot equate Internationality with Diversity.
I desperately hold onto the ideology that one day, I will contribute to the changes of the world. However, most of my energy is going towards fixing my own life. I find myself somewhere in between citizen of the world and a placeless generation.
As I return home, I have to face the truth: there is no way back.
I may find a place to stay longer and to build a home, but I will probably never return to the person I was before. Today, I secretly judge the simple and easy lifestyle I once knew.
While living this crazy suitcase life, untethered from the world and feeling lost, I can keep three main points in mind to ease the discomfort:
1. Focus on goals:
Rather than remembering the times you were invited to dinners, running into friends on the city street, focus on goals. Nostalgia should not change one's level of ambition. Instead, try to approach your life as the narrator of your own story, with patience and curiosity as you uncover your place in the world and what goals could ignite your spirit.
2. Focus on the moment:
In between chatting with old friends and talking with random people in a new place, focus on living in the moment. Every place or experience has something to offer even if it only lasts for a minute, a day, or a week. No matter the length of the moment, you can discover value in it if you remain present.
3. Focus on your inner value:
Even if you are couch surfing or you need help and advice from other, you should never lower your self-esteem. Sometimes in life, you can give more and at other times you will need more. It does not change who you are or your worth. Find your value, and always hold onto it even when you experience fleeting thoughts that you are less than.
Great guest post. I haven’t traveled as much as Inka but can identify with these feeling. I do live in DC though where it feels like as soon as you make a friend, they are moving away from the city. It is good to enjoy each day and focus on our goals to stay grounded
I am REALLY trying my best to focus on the moment(s) lately. I feel like I look at the big picture so much and never actually soak in the moments!
Great guest post, and so relevant! Being a post-grad I can so relate to feeling lost and trying to find your place in the world that is “adulting” can be super tough!
xx, Jamie
theblonderlife.com
Love this so much. Adulting is so tough, but focusing on these three things – especially the last one for me – is so huge.
Focusing on the moment is #1 for me!
As I’m applying to my first full-time job right now, focussing on GOALS is so important!!
xoxo A
http://www.southernbelleintraining.com
These are all so important. I need to learn to focus on the moment more.
I’m a millennial, feeling kinda lost right now. So this helps a ton! I’m trying to focus on goals, though…but I’m resisting the urge to sell everything and travel 🙂
Definitely agree with the second one! Focusing on the now and learning to live in the moment is oh so important!
I’m a big fan of focusing on the future, but I need to start living in the moment a little more! Great post!
-Anna | http://www.fivefootandfabulous.com
I’ve been trying to focus on being in the moment more! I’m always trying to think three steps (or days) ahead and it’s not always great for my stress levels. Heres to living more in the moment!
I feel like a lot of us millennials are lost. I always wonder if generations before felt this way too. Great tips. It’s a little hard for me to live in my moment right now but I can stand behind the goals. Making new ones now and I need to see them through. It’ll help me move on from my moment.
I always focus on my goals and I also think about why I started on this journey if I ever feel lost! Great tips.
Alix | http://www.apintsizedlifeblog.com
Love these tips! Thinking about the moment is such a great thing for me.
Realizing our value is so stinkin’ important. We have so much value and potential for awesome things, but we have to realize that and accept that before that’s going to be of any good to us.
This post – love. Having felt the same way while being a “citizen of the world” I could not agree more with your tips here – they are so on point. Focusing on the goal and inner value were key for me. Thanks for sharing – always need a reminder.
“I cannot equate Internationality with Diversity” <— loved this line!
Such an interesting perspective. I love the citizen of the world mentality 🙂
Such a great guest post! I love the live in the moment, I’ve really been working on that lately. Also I really love the fact that nostalgia is not ambition, it took me awhile to remember that!
xoxo
Ashley
This is such a great post! I’ve been working on living in the moment as well!